Raw Fusion: Representing The Pain

by on 9th May 2012

The 7th May 2012 episode of Monday Night Raw starts with a video recapping the events of last week involving John Cena, Lord Tensai, Sakamoto, and John Laurinaitis, followed by John Laurinaitis being introduced by Justin Roberts and making his way to the ring.

John Laurinaitis talks about how as the General Manager of both Raw and SmackDown!, he is the undisputed authority figure in WWE, so he will not allow anyone to judge his skills or insult him, and he says that after John Cena insulted him last week, he went into a fit of destruction that nobody can withstand.

He says that at Over The Limit he will continue from where Brock Lesnar stopped, and that if Cena thinks that he was humbled by Lesnar, then Laurinaitis will show him and everyone around the world how dangerous he can be, and he also states that he has not been reprimanded for his actions last week as the WWE Board Of Directors understand that he is tough but fair.

Laurinaitis says that as a result of this, he has requested that Cena not appear in person at the broadcast and that Cena recover as much as possible before Over The Limit, so that he has no excuses for losing to Laurinaitis, but Laurinaitis says that in the interest of “People Power”, Cena will appear on satellite and be interviewed by Michael Cole.

He also says that John Cena will apologise for making fun of his voice, and that he is putting every one of the WWE Superstars on notice that anyone who makes fun of his voice will suffer severe consequences. Laurinaitis explains that his voice wasn’t always like that, but he was injured in Tokyo, Japan by “Doctor Death” Steve Williams.

John Laurinaitis says that this did not stop him from becoming the biggest star of Japan however, as he then shows pictures of his accomplishments in Japan, and says that he was the Hulk Hogan, Steve Austin, and The Rock all rolled into one of Japan, and at the time he was approached by WWE with a lucrative contract, but he said no.

He says that at Over The Limit, for one night only we will see John Cena vs. “Big Johnny” John Laurinaitis.

CM Punk’s music hits and he makes his way to the ring, where he talks about how Laurinaitis still doesn’t have a clue what the fans want, despite being the so-called genius behind “People Power”. Luckily for John Laurinaitis, Punk says that he is out here to help him with that.

He says that the fans don’t want to see Laurinaitis, that he is ugly, has no friends, and is a gigantic toolbox. Laurinaitis says that if he wasn’t in training for his match with Cena right now, he would pummel Punk right into the ground.

Instead, Punk will face someone who knows the word “respect”, someone who went to Japan and honed their skills, coming back as a destructive force, and the man that Punk will be facing later on in the episode, is Lord Tensai.

Punk says that he had a feeling that Laurinaitis was going to do that, but he says that it is fine and that he looks forward to it, just like he looks forward to Over The Limit and watching John Cena twist Laurinaitis into a pretzel, forcing Laurinaitis to tap out.

After an interaction involving John Laurinaitis, The Big Show, and Eve Torres, in which Show makes fun of Laurinaitis’ voice after he leaves, Cody Rhodes takes on The Big Show for the Intercontinental Championship in a match which sees Show get the victory, but Rhodes retain his title, when Rhodes retreats up the ramp and refuses to re-enter the ring to beat the ten count, resulting in a count-out.

Afterwards, Show tries to convince Rhodes to come back down to the ring, but Rhodes leaves instead, with Eve Torres’ music hitting and her making her way to the ring. Eve demands that The Big Show apologise for making fun of John Laurinatis’ voice, and Show says that he’s sorry.

Eve isn’t happy with this however, as she says that she didn’t ask him to say that he is sorry, but that she asked him to apologise. She reminds him that outside of wrestling, there isn’t much of a need for a seven foot tall, 441lb forty-year old “freak”.

This statement seems to hit Show particularly hard, and he reluctantly apologises, before then leaving.

Next, AW, Rosa Mendes, Epico, Primo, and Mason Ryan watch on a monitor backstage as Kofi Kingston (accompanied by R-Truth) is pitted against Dolph Ziggler (accompanied by Vickie Guerrero and Jack Swagger) in a match which sees Ziggler get the victory, when he takes advantage of the interference behind the back of the referee by Swagger, and hits the Zig-Zag for the 3-count.

Now, Michael Cole interviews John Cena about the events of last week and his match at Over The Limit against John Laurinaitis, in which Cena explains that the WWE Board Of Directors contacted Cena and Cena asked them to not do anything to Laurinaitis until after Over The Limit, where he says he will kick Laurinaitis’ ass.

Next up, Beth Phoenix joins commentary as Natalya and Maxine go against Kelly Kelly and Layla in a tag team match which sees Layla get the victory for her team, when she hits Maxine with the Layout-neckbreaker for the 3-count.

After a video hyping Santino Marella’s YouTube Show “Santino’s Foreign Exchange”, Alberto Del Rio and Chris Jericho take on Randy Orton and Sheamus in a tag team match which sees Jericho get the victory for his team, when Sheamus accidentally hits Orton with the Brogue Kick due to Jericho ducking, and Jericho takes advantage by hitting Sheamus with the Codebreaker for the 3-count.

Afterwards, Sheamus helps Orton up and seems to be trying to explain what happened, but Orton then hits Sheamus with an RKO in retaliation for the Brogue Kick.

After an interaction backstage involving John Laurinaitis, Chris Jericho, Alberto Del Rio, Randy Orton, and Sheamus, which sees Jericho, Del Rio, Orton, and Sheamus fighting and Laurinaitis making a Fatal Four Way match for the World Heavyweight Championship at Over The Limit between the men involved, “Funkasaurus” Brodus Clay (accompanied by Cameron and Naomi) is pitted against The Miz.

Before the match takes place, The Miz expresses disgust at having to face Clay and says that if he wanted to see a hippo dance, he’d play “Mike Tyson’s Punch Out”, and says that after he beats Clay, he wants him to call his momma and tell her that he is The Miz and he is Awesome.

The match sees Clay get the victory, when he hits The Miz with a jumping body splash for the 3-count.

After a video recapping the events of last week involving Brock Lesnar and Triple H, and the announcers informing us that we will hear from Triple H live next week, the announcers inform us that Brock Lesnar has been extended an invitation to be a part of this episode of Monday Night Raw, but that instead he has sent his legal representative to update everyone on his legal situation.

Brock Lesnar’s music hits, and after a while, Lesnar’s legal representative is revealed as he makes his way to the ring, the representative being Paul Heyman. Heyman explains that reasonable demands were made that were agreed to live on television, making the fans party to that agreement, and he says that Lesnar feels betrayed by the WWE Universe and shouldn’t have to feel that way.

Paul Heyman says that Brock Lesnar is the only man to hold the NCAA Division 1 Heavyweight Wrestling Championship, Undisputed WWE Championship, and Undisputed UFC World Heavyweight Championship, but above all this, everyone should know that Lesnar is an honest man.

He says that Lesnar said that he was going to be an “ass-kicking machine” and was just that, and that Lesnar also hurt people like he said he would, but instead of running down Lesnar’s accolades, Lesnar asked Heyman to appear and read out an official statement from him.

Quoting the statement, Heyman says that Brock Lesnar came back to bring legitimacy back to WWE, and he did, but he was rewarded with the same BS that lead to him leaving eight years ago. He says that Lesnar does not regret what he did to John Cena, as he embarrassed him, just like he did Triple H, who he says has always been jealous of Lesnar.

He says that Triple H lasted an hour inside Hell In A Cell with The Undertaker, but couldn’t last one minute with Brock Lesnar. Lesnar had an agreement with the company, but Triple H broke it, so he broke his arm.

Heyman continues to quote the statement by saying that Lesnar says that he doesn’t care about the fans or about the corporate suits at the WWE, because Lesnar is never coming back as he quits.

After an interaction backstage involving The Big Show and stars of the new show “Common Law”, in which more fun is made of John Laurinaitis’ voice and Eve appears looking disappointed again, CM Punk is set to go against Lord Tensai.

Before the match takes place however, John Laurinaitis makes an appearance and turns it into a handicap match instead, with Tensai being joined by Punk’s opponent at Over The Limit, Daniel Bryan.

The match sees Tensai get the victory for his team, when he spits green mist into his hand and hits Punk with the resulting claw move for the 3-count.

Afterwards, Bryan puts Punk in the Yes Lock until being pulled away by the referee twice, and he stands tall in celebration over the downed Punk, as Raw goes off the air.

About the Author:

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Discovering WCW Monday Nitro in the 1990s, he has been hooked on wrestling ever since, later going on to also discover WWF (now WWE), ECW and numerous independent promotions.

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